In all of my breakup experience, one of two things are bound to happen: Folk will gain, or lose weight.
I’m what they call a skinny girl. A hard-gainer. It’s taken me over 40 years and a baby, to hit 115lbs.
Today, I’m 5lbs. lighter.
Now, don’t get me wrong– I’d been dealing with a couple of stressors already. It’s just that breakups add another level of stress, and I’m trying not to let that stress eat away at the progress I’ve made. Bottom line:
I want to keep my booty.
What I know is:
- I haven’t been drinking enough water. I’m ashamed to tell y’all exactly how much water I haven’t been drinking.
- I’ve been eating a meal and junk snacks a day.
- I’ve been up until at least 4am, and, yes
- I’ve been bumming and smoking cigarettes.
There’s clearly work to be done here.
- Every time I get the itch to check my phone for updates… Get a glass of water. (Note to self: Drink it, Scheherazade. Drink it all. That three sip shit ain’t gon’ cut it.)
That’s it. Just one step at a time.
Water, isn’t my favorite drink. Go figure. If there’s another option of beverage, I’m likely gonna choose that. The worst extremes of following Step One are (1) I will find myself so addicted to the Facebook that I’ll suffer water intoxication, or, (2) I’ll be so uninterested in the ‘book that I will wither from severe dehydration.
Hopefully, I’ll find a healthy balance, fully moisturized.
See, this is what I’ve come to know as progress. Rather than attack a long list of what will inevitably become another catalog of reasons to hold myself in contemptuous judgement of myself, all because I know better, I start small, and see where that takes me.
I allow myself small victories, and I give myself over the top, fully giddy, spontaneous happy dance and I’ve been drinking waterrrr!! song celebrations.
When I get overwhelmed, I go to my garden. It’s not much, which I suppose is a good thing. Means I don’t often get overwhelmed, right?
No. It means that I can’t go to the Facebook and meme my overwhelm away, which is a good thing, because,
MOST MEMES ARE ANNOYING.
I don’t know about you, but I personally haven’t successfully been able to Thich Nhat Hanh away the list of things I feel like I have to do, yet.
So. I go to my garden.
I clear the weeds that have shot up since the rain. Meet and chat with my plot neighbor, Marguerite. We both got a late start this season, and will try cool weather gardening this year.
I stake my tomato plants. I didn’t even plant them this year. They came back from last year!!
And my reward for tending to my garden?? A lovely green tomato. All ready to be fried.
And looky there. A snack.
I’m going to go cook that celebrity. The zebra tomato isn’t very good for frying. Found that out last year.
This is Day 3.
And this, is my contribution to annoying memeage: